Getting in Front of the Camera When I Didn't Feel My Best, as an Amarillo Photographer

A few weeks ago I was sitting in my doctor's waiting room when I felt the first major symptoms of Bell's Palsy, a temporary paralysis that affects one side of the face. I already had a routine headshot session scheduled for the following week with my friend Tristyn Miller, something I do from time to time to keep my own photos current.

I messaged her right there in the waiting room and told her what was happening. As the days went on and the session got closer, I wasn't sure I wanted to keep the appointment. I did not feel like myself, and the last thing I wanted was a camera pointed at me. But as I sat with it, I kept coming back to the same thought. If this were one of my own clients, I would be encouraging her to keep the session, and I would be right there making sure she felt safe doing it. Extra breaks. Plenty of water. No rushing. Her comfort would come before any photo. I would tell her that this moment, exactly as it is, is worth capturing, and that we would go at whatever pace she needed.

So I kept the appointment, and I gave myself the same care I would give any client.

I still don't fully understand what caused the Bell's Palsy or exactly how long it will last, only that it could be anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. My speech has changed a little, and one side of my face droops. But when the day came, I showed up anyway.

Here is what I have learned, sitting on both sides of the lens. So many of us wait for the right moment to be photographed. We wait until we lose the baby weight, until our skin clears up, until we feel more like ourselves again. I have heard some version of this from clients right here in Amarillo and Canyon more times than I can count, usually whispered right before a session, almost like a confession. I don't feel my best right now.

Here is what I want every one of you to know. There is no such thing as the right moment. There is only this one, the one you are in right now.

When I sat for my own session, I was honestly nervous about how my face would show up in the photos. What I found surprised me. With the right posing, the right light, and a little guidance, some of the images do not even hint at what is happening beneath the surface. Others show it plainly, and I love those too, because they are true. Both versions are me. Both versions deserve to be remembered.

Photographed By Tristyn Miller Photography

This is the part of my job I care about most. It is not just about taking a nice photo. It is about helping you feel steady and capable in front of the camera, even on the days you feel the least like yourself. Whether that is a tired postpartum morning, a season of change, or simply a day you were not expecting to be photographed at all, a good photographer's job is to meet you exactly where you are and help you see yourself the way the people who love you already do.

If you have been putting off a session because you are waiting to feel ready, I want to gently push back on that. Ready is not a feeling you have to earn. It is something we can create together, right here, right now, in this season of your life exactly as it is.

Sessions are currently open for maternity, newborn, Fresh 48, and family photography throughout Amarillo, Canyon, and the greater Texas Panhandle. If you have been waiting for a sign, let this be it.